Kind of stinks for the loser. Kind of stinks for the winner too, just not now.
This weekend was one sporting event after another. And it was fun. Boys and young men who faithfully do their push ups everyday competing against one another, for the ball, for a pin, for the end zone. And 99% of the time the athletes were fair and decent. Then comes the boys and moms and dads and coaches who are not fair, do not play fair. Use words like strategy to manipulate the sport or don't use any words and just cheat. And win! The peers gather in a circle shake their heads in disgust and call the kid a dirty player...the dad interjects with a laugh and says to the boys, "yea, but he wins...you losers don't." Doesn't seem fair or right because it isn't. Guess sports is sometimes a microcosm of life. And like all of life whatever the apparent outcome, we still can't cheat time or God. We have to shake it off and continue to preach do the right thing, and keep the faith.
ugh we ran into this last week...my son had his first football game....peewee 7-8 yr olds...and one parent on the other team would blow an airhorn everytime our kids tried to run a play...if i would have known who i might have been a bad role model...just saying...
ReplyDeleteSuch a contrast to your last post.
ReplyDeleteJane x
My daughter played basketball all through her growing up years and into high school. When she was little she played in a faith linked league. It was always a pleasure. Kids were good sports, coaches were positive, and parents were well behaved. Then in middle school, she got into some private hoop clubs. Different experience--oh my! It quit being fun for all of us. It was hard to keep emphasizing to her that good sportsmanship and team playing trumped winning when the coaches were yelling and the parents were rude. For goodness sakes, they're kids! Why do we want them to play sports in the first place?
ReplyDeleteback when I helped coach the local football team, it was always the parents who seemed to be worse...what kind of lesson do they think they are teaching their children...
ReplyDeleteVery sad for the young ones. My daughter has elected to stop playing sports and pursue other extra curricular activities because she became so disgusted with unscrupulous parents and children!
ReplyDeletethe dad interjects with a laugh and says to the boys, "yea, but he wins...you losers don't."
ReplyDeleteThis is wrong, so wrong. And a form of child abuse, actually. No decent person acts like this. This guy's son will grow up to be a bully like his father.
Well said. Love Di ♥
ReplyDeleteHate it when bad parents try to re-live their lost chances through their kids and ruin a "sport" as a result and spoil it for all the kids out there! Wonder how many potentially 'good athletes' we lose because kids get disenchanted with the 'bad sport phenomenon'?
ReplyDeleteThe child cannot be blamed but how terrible to teach your child to cheat. Shame on the dad.
ReplyDeleteMakes me sad that there are parents out there that teach their kids these values.....
ReplyDeleteIt's most difficult to teach our own youngsters to be honest and law abiding and then have a role model who tends to cheat just to win...win a title, or a game, or perhaps a heart.
ReplyDeleteYour post brought memories of raising my own kids and the 'game of cheat to win' would always surface. Well written.
it's a sad when cheaters are rewarded and fair play isn't
ReplyDeleteOh, yes, we have to stay the course with God no matter what else is happening around us or how others behave. Life isn't fair - we know this - but, it is sad to see adults going out of their way to teach kids the wrong life lessons. It only perpetuates the evils that already plague our society.
ReplyDeleteBlessings, Annmarie!
John Wooden taught his players to always do the right thing, and he never talked to them about winning and losing, only about personal success, which he defined as the self-satifaction that comes from knowing you did the best you could. His teams won 10 national championships in 12 years. When asked whether he thought he deserved to be in the hall of fame, he answered that there is only one hall of fame into which he hoped to be inducted - God's Hall of Fame!
ReplyDeleteThat's gamesmanship for ya win at all costs.
ReplyDeleteYep, it's a lot like life!
ReplyDeleteHow sad- the kids follow the parent's lead and move into a life of cheating and stepping on others for the "win". Pretty sad all the way around- xo Diana
ReplyDelete"We have to shake it off and continue to preach do the right thing, and keep the faith." This says it all~
ReplyDeleteSo true!
ReplyDeleteDee
Trust me, their day will come, and payback is not very cool! It's really sad for the children. My oldest had those kinds of parents running around like it was the end of the world, if their kid didn't win, or make a touch down. Today, my son is not like those parents with his own children...lesson learned in one family!
ReplyDeleteWonderful ! Reminded me of a book,on sale back home, that is said to be able to teach 'how to make your kid a winner', a biography by a mother, no, didn't buy it. So far my son is able to say 'I would like to' as he does not know 'I want'; whether that is good or not, not sure yet, he's five.
ReplyDeleteThis is probably the hardest thing in life to endure, to use a teaching tool, to forgive and get over...it does kind of stink...but shot gun on the karma bus CAN be a very very good place indeed! Or real bad.
ReplyDeleteMy experience while raising our children was that parents don't always set the best of examples as far as good sportsmanship goes. What a pity that we are planting those kinds of seeds into our children. I really admire that you are trying to teach your kids that winning isn't everything. Tricky business trying to teach them to strive for excellence but in a ethical manner.
ReplyDeleteYou said it just like it is. a darn shame too!
ReplyDeleteAmen, very true.
ReplyDeleteWe lead by example even if we don't realize they are watching! I yell constantly about sportsmanship when I see it being neglected form the opposing teams, it is a petpeeve, win or lose play fair and like a good sport no matter what is allowed by others. Some kids become jaded but others become good human beings I think you are raising good human beings regardless of the win to lost ratio :)
ReplyDeleteI'm afraid that you're right about sports and life. I sometimes wonder how much rotten stuff is taught through sports. I realize the value of a good sports program but it's not all good.
ReplyDeleteSo sad when parents don't lead by example. It seems that our entire society has become too much like the "win at all costs" father you wrote about. Just look at the presidential campaign!
ReplyDeleteI agree - this is so sad. My son played soccer when he was little. As soon as it became more about "winning" that "fun," he quit.
ReplyDeleteIt is sad, and hard to keep our faith when we are faced with these people...and sadly, the kids learn from the parents. The cycle continues...
ReplyDeleteThanks for visiting my blog. This is true and sad. I see it a lot as a middle school teacher.
ReplyDeleteHaha! You crack me up!! My son plays football in the fall, indoor football in the winter and a mix between lax and baseball in the Spring. It's never ending and I complain about it but in the end it's worth it!
ReplyDeleteI missed that part of childhood with my girls. They went to an all-girl's Catholic school and didn't really play sports...although Kelly did run cross-country. I've seen the kind of parents you mention and it is appalling. Sports should be enjoyed and a character builder, so what are they learning when they see adults behave like that!
ReplyDeleteUgg... sad to see stuff like that. Yes, we just have to keep trying to do the right thing... regardless. :)
ReplyDeleteI hear you Mama:) I see it too, I don't like it either and just have to teach ours THAT isn't the right way! Have a blessed week dear friend, HUGS!
ReplyDeleteGames are meant to be fun.
ReplyDeleteSo true. Where's the fun? Has that gotten lost in the quest for winning?
ReplyDeleteGood post!!
ReplyDeleteI think that attitude is very sad. I try to teach my girls it's all about fun. And secretly, when I play games with others, I always lose on purpose. It makes me feel good to let others win. My husband and kids think it's funny, and I hope that my kids will see that attitude of mine and realize that it's not always about being the winner.
ReplyDeleteyes, I am just realizing I am up agaist the parents often times other than just the "other kids"...ugh....and it is probably only get worse as the kids get older...more ugh...!!
ReplyDeleteThanks for your positive words on my growing family! :)
What do you expect when you got Hardcore Boys and vice versa?
ReplyDeleteRikki Silver Wares 5 did Riccia 9.
And it goes to show you Rossiboy cannot be contained on Nnship with Adfren 25.
Risa got books on Gigolo and all the Porkela in Telsagun.
So you better knock it off as Fooffav 6 has done and all that Casa Donasa De Vencedoras.
With Carmen Changg.
Not to mention Maijan Rosen.
Toronto blowing away physicians and Rove .
Including Ricky Berlin.
you've got some spam here, Annmarie. :-(
DeleteMy kids all opted out of sports because they weren't interested when they saw all the ways the players were cheated. They felt as bad when the bad calls were for them as against them. They said that 'not fair' was 'not fun'. So now, they all play the piano.
ReplyDeleteIt was a good trade. :)
It's so true what you are saying..
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Aga
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O that sucks! Such a pity!
ReplyDeleteDeep down they know they are cheats, and they cannot get away from that fact!
ReplyDeleteGreat blog! Wanna follow each other?
ReplyDeletehttp://fashionresidence.com/
Been there and watched it. They know who they are and have to live with it. Have a great week!
ReplyDeleteIt stinks. And those who live by such morals are the real losers.
ReplyDeleteThey are supposed to be role models as parents imparting good values to their own kids. There are too many of such parents these days.
ReplyDeleteBaseball is full of mean players--mostly because they have mean parents! Mean parents put up with calling the parents on the opposing team bad words (we don't even say dumb, stupid or shut-up in our home)!
ReplyDeleteMean players try to take good players (my son) out of the game by cleating him so bad his foot bleed. Good parents then spend hours telling their player why we don't return the evil gesture. Good parents must do a lot of damage control.
I'm sad sports is often just life--I don't like that part of life. I want to get a head by working harder than anyone else not by being meaner.
I'm glad we are done with baseball (college baseball was no better). Now it's on to playing the game of life--our son has learned plenty, he is a very honest businessman--we are proud of him. I'm afraid he still has to lose a few baseball words though!
such a shame
ReplyDeleteWhat a sad commentary on today's state of affairs. One of the reasons we encouraged our kids to play team sports was to instill a keener appreciation of cooperation and fair play. What are THOSE parents instilling in their children?
ReplyDeleteYeah that happens and it really stinks...
ReplyDeleteBut cheaters know very well that they cheated and that feeling is never make them really proud.
On the other hand, if you are honest and proud of yourself, that's a huge WIN in life :)
Oh boy, do I remember those days..it is so hard to keep the chin up and tell your kids that 'right' always wins in the end. Sometimes 'end' doesn't come for a long, long time. xo
ReplyDeleteThanks for the follow :) I"m following back now!
ReplyDeletewww.studentswife.com
Seeing some of the things that happen in sport - how chancy and unfair it is - I just plain wince. I shouldn't but I do.
ReplyDeleteI am always happy to see the kids play sports, but not too keen on many of the coaches and parents. Winning is what it is all about.
ReplyDeleteSo true. We see this in our world too (we are not into sports), it really is in every area of life sadly. I think what is saddest most of all are the people who think they CAN cheat God, time and things that are out of their control.
ReplyDeleteThat is right and about all one can do.. It is still a dirty rotten shame..
ReplyDeleteIt seems that sports tend to bring out the worst of some who lean that way. Mean spirited isn't an isolated trait.
ReplyDeleteSports!!!! I had the same experience with my kids 30 years ago. Nothing has changed.
ReplyDeleteThe same winners and cheaters (not just in sport either) also boast of their illegal and unfair practices by building obscene houses with tasteless trappings. They'll all have a day of judgement though Annmarie, if not in this life then in the next.
ReplyDeleteThank you for the visit.
ReplyDeletewhen i look back on the many years my boys were involved in sports, i wish now we hadn't participated. we did not gain what i thought we would and i am now embarrassed that i subjected my boys to all the unsportsmen like behavior from coaches and parents.
ReplyDeleteat the time it seemed important, now i know it wasn't!!
It's a sad time for the kids when their parents are supposed to teach them good sportsmanship and they don't. One of my niece's was a coach for a girls' basketball team and she loved it, but did not love the flack she got from the parents because they got so nasty. It became too stressful and eventually she just couldn't take it and decided to quit. My niece is one of the nicest people you could wish to meet and those parents lost a great coach due to their dreadful attitude.
ReplyDeleteI upsets me that good kids have to deal with bad eggs. But thank God for the good ones.
ReplyDeletePam
Kids learn from their parents.... Nuff said!
ReplyDeleteI don't like cheaters, but the world is full of them. I guess it is best we learn young how to deal with people like that.
ReplyDeleteIn the end (and we don't always see it), cheaters never really win. Although sometimes, I would prefer instant-karma.
ReplyDeleteKarma. To the anonymous comment above, too.
ReplyDeleteGod, you must have the patience of a saint!
ReplyDeleteIt just amazes me soemtimes :(. Very sad.
ReplyDeletenow I can see you =)
ReplyDeleteJust another teaching moment for the kiddos, unfortunately. Have a great weekend!
ReplyDeleteIt makes me feel good to know that faced with cheating, I carry on with my own ethics and don't want to emulate the cheaters in order to win.x
ReplyDeleteHow awful! Just have to teach your kids the right way to behave, and pray for families who don't educate their own kids.
ReplyDeleteI can so relate to this post. My son just played his grand final. There was a really ugly incident that happened on the field by a 12 year old. And some of the adults tactics were questionable. I am so proud of my boy and his team for playing by the rules, being passionate and doing their best even though they lost. So important not to become bitter when ugly stuff happens but to keep a sweet spirit and pray for the players who don't. Xx
ReplyDeleteThat type of poor behavior makes me angry, and what is appalling is that a parent would encourage it. This misguidance will catch up with the cheaters. My only wish is that people don't get hurt along the way.
ReplyDeleteCheating seems rampant in sports, the young see it in the big leagues with bribes and steroids. Sadly, it IS a reflection of life. People don't operate from the same standard. We'll all be equally accountable to God, however, and justice will ultimately served.
ReplyDeleteThanks for your visit and linking up to the hop. Its always great seeing you there. :) Have a fabulous evening. God bless you!
ReplyDeleteSO true. I try to focus on the "can't cheat God" part and just focus on my own truth, but it's hard!
ReplyDeleteWoe to the child whose parents cause a scandal by bad example; and whose parents condone, even promote, bad behavior and values. With parents like this, what can we expect of the future.
ReplyDeleteWhat a shame!
ReplyDeleteThat's so true. It hurts when others are doing wrong but they make good lessons of what is wrong and what not to do.
ReplyDeleteSigh...sad to hear when something like this happens. What are dads like this teaching their children?
ReplyDeleteYes. See and create beautiful, goodness, kindness. Help wanted!
ReplyDeleteMy kids played on a lot of teams, and I wish every one of them had been a positive experience. I'm not even sure most of them were.
ReplyDelete"/
It's sad that some have to play dirty just to win. It's really not a competition. Don't they feel they are cheating themselves and not winning in a fair game? The adults are sending a wrong message to the kids.
ReplyDeleteOhhh... this is too bad... My oldest boy is only 6, so I haven't come across this yet... our soccer and T-ball games are still fun where winning doesn't matter... I want it to stay like this forever!
ReplyDeleteStill winning in a decent way is the greatest way to achieve success. It's not only that these people who cheat fool those other people but they're also fooling themselves too.
ReplyDeleteI saw stuff like that when my son played baseball and basketball. Sad people are teaching there kids that.
ReplyDeleteSports, unfortunately, bring out the worst in some people. Shame on them.
ReplyDeleteI am sometimes amazed at the things I hear parents advise their kids to do during games (elbow him in the eye, etc.). It is always refreshing to hear kids and parents that are being good sports. :)
ReplyDelete~Jess
Aw, hard to believe parents would encourage bad behavior, but I have it of it too many times to think it's not true. Sorry you have to experience it from time to time, it can be a real drag for the adults, I'm sure, but probably multiply that by a hundred for the kiddos who compete fairly and then lose to such ridiculous tactics.
ReplyDeleteThank you so much! I am already following you by the way! It must be very difficult to raise kids...my mom knows something about it:)
ReplyDeleteIt tough when all the kids want to do is have fun and the adults start forcing winning on them. Booo, takes the spirit of the sport out. Thanks for sharing and prepping me for the time when our little one starts playing sports. Stopping by from Exposure 99%
ReplyDelete